28 July 2008

Matt Lauer spotted at IHOP on Mars ...

hey, Lauer-loving Brady Braves ... on this morning's today show, mr. "where in the world is matt lauer?" previewed what was coming up post-commercial break: "You, too, can conquer the space frontier if you have enough money" ... [cue Lauer smile]

just alter-spin "space" to "[wherever-Indigenous-Peoples-were/are]," add "guns" and "greed" after "money," and you've got yourself, today show fans, an historical global formula--from "australia" to the "americas"--tried-and-true ... as for the segment's topic? sir richard branson's virgin atlantic globalflyer ... for just $200,000, you can sign up for travelling to space, the new "colonization-awaits" vacation destination ... sweet ...

speaking of sweet, what was the first commercial after the segment on space travel? IHOP's "Discover America Pancakes" ad, of course ... yeah, IHOP's only about 516 years behind on that one ... we all know Mr. Ohio State Capital discovered america ... don't listen to those sources that tell ya Native folks were here pre-1492 ... those are the same sources that'll try to brainwash you into believing that Ind'ns, not IHOP, discovered pancakes ...

so, let us envision IHOP, the space-colonization, today show promoting pancake house, on Mars [sorry, Pluto--you don't count] ... and let us start a campaign for Lauer to appear in the soon-to-be ad campaign "IHOP Discovers Space Pancakes [and then profits from the Indigenous beings of outer space]" ... so sweet again ...

speaking of travels, the bureau of brady braves is relocating (again) this week ... something about ind'ns and relocation, ennit? ... once settled in like a 1907 sooner settler, we'll be back to the blogosphere ... take care ...

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